About the Author
C Scott Morris was born in 1975 and spent his childhood Salt Lake City, Coruscant and Gondor. His father Scott, a professional swindler and teller of tales, and his mother Colleen, a gypsy potion brewer and organized hoarder, traveled for a variety of reasons, none of which were nefarious. Repeated inquiries with the FBI vehemently deny any associate with the Witness Relocation Program.
Like most geniuses, C Scott did little with the educational opportunities offered him, instead using school as a place to study women and pursue philosophy. He was inflicted with a variety of occupations: Undesirable Growth Extraction Specialist, Maniacal Atheist, Drug-Store Clerk and Analgesic Stalker, Non-Performing and Non-Producing Poet, Apprentice Lay-About and De-Dilapidator of Homes, though the Department of Labor lists only Grounds Crew, Retail Clerk and Carpenter. C Scott then discovered that writing requires very little heavy lifting and no early mornings.
The most frequent sightings of C Scott occur in the red-rock around Moab, Utah and a few quirky coffee shops, the kinds of places it is suggested that one not feed the poets or make eye-contact with the hippies. Unconfirmed sightings of C Scott have been documented in SanFrancisco and Denver, as well as Taiwan and Kadzikistan, though most sightings have been discredited as hoaxes. There is one rather blurry photo taken by a sherpa in southern Tibet that tantalizingly remains un-discredited.
After his failed academic pursuit of philosophy, C Scott disappeared for few years, only to reappear in 1997 with a wife. He then settled down, bought a house, and began raising a family. Once again, similarities to the Witness Relocation Program are alarming. The FBI stubbornly refuses to comment, trying to defer all questions to the US Marshals. This journalist is not so easily distracted, and more inquiries will follow.
Over the next few years, C Scott received a degree in Gastronomical Grilling, and fell only a few credits short of a Masters in Procrastination. This is the period where the FBI managed to insert fake documents into the Department of Labor files maintaining C Scott’s cover as a humble carpenter. This allowed him to serve as an undercover operative for Section 7. He did not, at any time during this period, slay or destroy any zombies, vampires, or other undead.
The economic collapse following the burst of the housing bubble lead to a cut in Section 7′s funding, and C Scott was forced to give up his cover as a carpenter. His current disguise is that of a stay-at home father. He continues to pursue his career of little to no heavy lifting and late mornings.
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